Sunday, December 6, 2009

My New Decision

I cannot remember a time when people weren't asking about my eyes or making fun of them. I have had the lovely nicknames of ching chong, I think I'm turning Japanese (too long to stick), Chinese devil, white ninja and Chwexican (that's Chinese-White-Mexican). There maybe more but these are the ones that stuck out.

A few weeks ago yet another patient asked me what my "nationality." While I thought about saying American and not paying attention to here thinly veiled attempt to find out if I'm Asian or not, but I decided to give her the information she was looking for. I told her that my family is a mix of just about anything you could think of, everything except Asian. She did not believe me, so she asked, "No Asian at all? Are you sure?"

Other than being a little annoyed with the stupid way she asked I told her that I am mostly German. She responded by shouting, "German? German? They don't have eyes like that!" She said this so loudly that the nurses at the station begin to look in.

I start blushing a bit with frustration and embarrassment. I finish my test and leave, handing the EKG to the nurse who is looking at my eyes trying to decide if I really am Asian or not.

So after this I decided that I'll have to get some plastic surgery to correct my eyes, just to keep people from asking me what my nationality is.

That plan seemed good until last night. I did an EKG on an older, very angry lady. As soon as I stepped into the room she looked at me and asked, "Why do you shave your head?"

This question comes up at work nearly as much as the eye question. Apparently, my bald head is very offensive to the older population. Then I realized, I can get my eyes changed, but then what? Hair plugs? That doesn't sound very appealing. I could try a toupee with scalp snaps like my grandpa, but that sounds painful. Then there is my nose, not many people ask about it, but how would they ask that? Are you related to an elephant? How about my Adam's apple? Would I have to get corrective surgery to fix that too?

So I decided it's much cheaper to just put up with the questions about my eyes and head and see what kind of creative nicknames people come up with.


Valerie said...

I still don't get the whole eye thing. I just never thought they looked that different. Maybe because I've always known you. :) But I can't believe what strange, rude questions and behavior some people think is acceptable. Sorry you have to deal with all that.

Tiff :o) said...

Sorry for making fun of your adam's apple when we were younger, I was mean. Like Valerie, I never really think about your eyes looking different. Even when you say something about them, I just don't see it. One thing I've decided as I've gotten older is that I really don't care enough about what other people think to worry about what I look like. Could have saved some money on braces but oh well.

Stella Andes said...

I think you look great, Jared, and I'm glad you decided not to get plastic surgery on your eyes. I am glad I didn't get a nose job too, because it's who I am, and if I was made that way, I just was. You're right anyway when you say that if it isn't one thing it's another. If we start trying to make ourselves different to please some people, others won't like the new look, so we just can't win and need to accept how we look as perfectly fine. The people who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind, right?

Us said...

Valerie and Tiffany, thanks for saying you don't see anyting weird about my eyes. Tiffany, don't worry about the vulture neck stuff. I'm not. Besides, I was much worse. I owe you the apology. Mom, the real reazon I decided not to try to change all of the features I don't like (other than money of course) is that they don't have a surgery to make a man taller. Oh well. At least I never hit my head on anything!

Stella Andes said...

By the way, I think people are wrong when they say you look Asian. People asked me that about Heather when she was little too.

Terry Family said...

Those comments are horrible, annoying and rude. I'm so sorry. can tell me -- what is your nationality REALLY?

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